If only

In life, there are many appealing and delightful days. And then, there are ‘those days’.  Those days when my vitality is riled or peeved. And that's when I question everything I know to be true. Yesterday was one of  ‘those days’.

If only God had blessed me with a little more drawing skills
I would paint the world a little differently
If only I'm a little bit more talented
I'd sketch a beautiful and picturesque landscape

If only this was a figment or illusion
The implausible can be plausible
And the joyless days would be heaven-sent days

Alas, this is not a fantasy
This is reality
Where life can be mean to you
Each day is an eternal struggle
Where daily challenges crop up
Where you get stabbed in the back
and have a door slammed right in your face
And you're left wondering "Why?"

If only this was a hallucination
People would be walking in the rain
Everyone would be smiling
There'll be lots of hugging
But that is so rare
Coz most people don't really care

If only this was a fiction
We can undo the past and make every moment last
There would be no tears
Nor would there be fears

If only you don't have to wake up from your fantasy
From those beautiful dreams which make you deliriously happy
If only you can sleep off the pain and let it evaporate
Wishing it would disappear as you have no more tears to shed
All the good has gone away but you wished it would not dissipate
If only............

If only. These must be the two saddest words in the world.