اِنّا لِلّهِ وَاِنّا اِلَيْهِ رَجِعُوْنَ

اِنّا لِلّهِ وَاِنّا اِلَيْهِ رَجِعُوْنَ

Sleep eludes me yet again

Sleep eludes me for the second consecutive night in my hotel room in Kuching. Strangely I had easily fallen asleep but when I was awaken in the middle of the night, I had difficulty resuming my sleep.

I had contemplated resuming my editing work but did not want to disturb my sleeping hubby.

So here I am blogging my thoughts in the wee hours of the morning.

Erti sebuah keindahan

Di sebalik nota kecil itu

Terkubur seribu kenangan

Bait bait syair

Rangkap rangkap ketulusan

Nota diselak sehelai demi sehelai

Diiringi senyuman penuh bermakna

Kenangan terindah terpampang di bola mata

Ada tika ia ketawa

Ada tika berjejeran air mata

Kokokan ayam membelah kesunyian

Pecutan kenderaan mengganggu kedamaian

Laungan azan sayup kedengaran

Bangunlah kamu dari lamunan!

WanKinsella@Lubukhatiku

Tika kebosanan melanda
Daun daunan berguguran
Benak fikiran bercelaru

Tikaman di kalbu terasa
Kealpaan kelalaian
Tiadakah perasaan malu

Ingatlah akan azab neraka
Duniawi dipentingkan
Malaikat pencatat baru berlalu

Allah SWT kau pinggirkan
Apakah kesudahan dirimu?

Ya Allah. Berikanlah diri aku ini kekuatan

Aku masih dibelenggu

Kenangan silam sering menghantui ku

Kepedihan di lubuk hati

Kepiluan di sanubari

Tidak berupaya untuk aku menahan

Ingatan lampau yang berlegar di benak fikiran ku

Sepanjang perjalanan ku yang berliku liku

Keperitan yang telah aku meniti

Tidak sanggup lagi aku mengharungi

Telah aku cuba melupakan

Namun sering buntu

Paparan demi paparan

Jelas terbayang di mata hati ku

Kemasyghulan bagai onak nan berduri

Aku dambakan kebahagiaan

Namun semuanya palsu

Aku sering termanggu

Kemelut ingatan menghiris jiwa ku

Ya Allah bantulah hamba mu ini
Dekatkan aku pada Penawar untuk Hatiku! 

WanKinsella@Lubukhatiku.Julai2012

Mak, I Need You So

9 November 2009, Monday (22 Zulkaedah)

Mak

You brought me into this world 

eon years away

You tended to me 

day and night

You watched me grow

From a wriggling tiny tot 

to an adult

Many existence later

you gave my hands away

Mak I miss you so

I miss your soft touch

I miss your gentle caress

I miss your soothing advice

I miss your endearing voice

Oh how I miss you Mak

Can you hear me?

Can you touch me?

Can you caress me?

Can you console me?

Mak I need you so....

WanKinsella@Lubukhatiku

A place called loneliness...

Can you be surrounded by people, yet feel lonely?

  

Do you still feel lonely amidst a sea of people? 

At times we can feel a sense of loneliness even when we are surrounded by many people.

 

If you could shop for loneliness,

would you shop alone?

Would you shop among many,
or would there even be any?

And if you were to find loneliness,
sitting there upon a shelf.

Would you be willing to pay the price,
for the seclusion of ones self?

We spite the feel of loneliness.
Although it is quite real.

We can't quite escape the darkness and self pity,
that loneliness makes us feel.

Loneliness often makes us think of family
and mistakes we have made in life.

My loneliness comes most often,
when I think about my parents and my family. 

WanKinsella@Lubukhatiku

Ku lakarkan sebuah impian

Di hati ku lakarkan sebuah impian

Yang aku namakan harapan

Apabila ku tentukan arah serta tujuan

Rela ku hadapi cabaran

Jalan ke puncak itu beronak dan berliku

Menyukarkan pendakianku

Namun tetap ku gagahi hati yang rapuh ini

Demi hasrat yang suci

Aku sangkakan harapan selembut impian

Yang menguliti tidur insan

Kiranya kehidupan tidak sedemikian

Goyah hatiku oleh kenyataan

Tak harus ku turuti kelemahan diri

Tak daya bertahan diuji

Lalu aku mengumpulkan semula kekuatan

Berlandaskan keimanan

WanKinsella@Lubukhatiku

Bisakah masa merubah segalanya?

Pabila malam menerjah
Tatkala sunyi membelah waktu
Ketika cengkerik bersahu sahutan
Tika haiwan dan manusia melabuhkan tubuh mereka
Selepas keletihan melalui hari yang berliku

Aku cuba memejamkan mataku
Aku cuba melupakan segala galanya
Aku cuba menepis rasa duka
Aku cuba menangkis perasaan hiba
Aku cuba memadamkan dari minda
Aku cuba dan aku cuba
Namun aku tidak terdaya

Air mata kepedihan mula berjujuran
Setitik demi setitik membasahi pipiku dan bahuku
Aku cuba menahan sebak di dada
Aku cuba memendam kehibaan yang bergelora
Aku cuba dan kucuba
Namun aku kecundang
Buat sekian lamanya

Bikakah ini akan berakhir?
Hanya takdir akan menentukannya...
Ku serah hanya pada Yang Maha Esa

WanKinsella@Lubukhatiku

Destiny - You and I

You
I
Two different souls
But
Our paths crossed
And recrossed
And recrossed
We got entangled along the way
Can the knots ever be untangled?
Can it be detangled?

You
I
Two dfferent beings
Our destiny
Intertwined
Forever

WanKinsella@Lubukhatiku

Picture this scenario: Funny but True

I am pretty certain that most people had experienced this before. You were happily and confidently walking somewhere, and suddenly your feet graced against something, and you either fell flat on your face, or if you were lucky, you managed to get hold of yourself in the nick of time before being sprawled in an embarrassing heap on the floor.

And what's really hilarious is that 99% of the time, (i.e if you fall under the lucky category), you will turn to look at what had caused the mishap. It is as though, by doing that you'd redeem your embarrassing situation.

And silently telling the world that "hey, it wasn't my fault!" I was careful but that "thing" on the floor, pavement, walkway was the one who had caused it.

Gee!!! I just saw one guy on a rooftop in front of the hotel that I'm staying in Singapore tripped just as he started making his way back.

And you guessed right. Despite knowing that there wasn't anyone watching him, he did turn back to take a look at what "object" had caused him to stumble (of course he didn't realize that yours truly was watching his entire antic from the comfort of my hotel room). Hence, what triggered me to express my thought on this scenario - Funny but True!!!

The GIFT of HEALTH is keeping me ALIVE. Thank you Allah!

Hanya Padamu Aku Berserah

Macam-macam yang bermain di benak fikiranku

Ah...berserabutnya

Hanya padamu aku berserah

Ya Allah Ya Rabbi Ya Rabbulalamin

Friends are like rare gems

Ever wondered why you choose certain friends over the others, especially friends who are dear to you? In our lives, we picked up many friends, and along the way, there would be friends you meet either in school, college, university, work, courses, etc. and these days we can also make lots of friends either through Facebook or other social media platform.

In my case, I have made lots of friends over the years, from my primary school days in Singapre and Penang up to my high school. And I have also befriended many college and university mates in Kuala Lumpur.

These friends form the various phases of your life. Some are like sand on the beach.

With each crushing wave they are washed ashore, while others are like rocks standing strong and steadfast, embedded to last a lifetime.

There are friends who fit the maxim, "A friend in need is a friend indeed", while some others are just there for you briefly, someone who has no qualms deserting you in your hour of need.

I still recalled this story related by my brother when asked why he did not ask one of us siblings to pick him up at the airport (at that time he was still studying abroad) and his reply amused me inmensely. "It's ok. My friend can pick me up. I feel more comfortable getting my friend to pick me up. In any case I do not want to trouble you guys!"

Strange that sometimes we are not comfortable with our own siblings yet we feel very much at ease confiding in our friends, baring our soul to them. Strange indeed but that's life's reality.

Waiting to be devoured

These are my collection of treasure trove waiting to be devoured!

Delightful-KhaiKids-Stories1: Dari jendelaku-27-3-2012

Dari jendela kamarku, aku perhatikan bas-bas sekolah berlalu. Teringat masa anak-anak aku masih bersekolah. Pengangkutan inilah yang telah membawa mereka ke sekolah saban hari.

Pada pemandu-pemandu bas sekolah ini aku meletakkan nyawa anak-anakku setiap hari. Syukur alhamdulillah, tiada apa-apa perkara yang tidak diingini berlaku dalam tempoh persekolahan mereka.

Fikiranku melayang teringat akan satu kisah yang amat menggelikan hati mengenai anak bongsuku yang juga menggunakan perkhidmatan bas sekolah untuk ke sekolahnnya. Kejadian ini berlaku pada awal persekolahannya. This hilarious story.... - next change!!!

Are you coming or not?

Oh my! It's been ages since I last wrote in my blog. I have been buried under a rubble and mountains of work/projects/commitments since the 3rd quarter of last year that I've totally neglected penning down my thoughts.


If truth be told, my schedule is still extremely tight. Alas, I am compelled to write as I've been feeling awfully frustrated lately.


To be precise I'm fed up. I'm fed up with people who do not have the courtesy to reply or respond to RSVPs or emails or sms.

RSVP, in case you're wondering what it means, stands for a French phrase, "respondez, s'il vous plait,', which when translated, simply means, "please reply'. 


Trust me, it will not take more than 1 or 2 seconds to reply to an sms. If you do not believe me, try timing yourself! What really bugs me is that some of these people not only fail to respond to sms, they don't even have the courtesy to respond or pick up phone calls!!


Sometimes, I just wonder why people ever bother to own a handphone if all they do is ignore all calls or smses! Aren't these people aware that courtesy would demand them to respond to RSVPs or smses?


Imagine if everyone were to have such uncouth and ill-mannered habits, what would happen to a host who needs to tally the number of guests against food to be catered or ordered for a function he/she is planning to host?


The rules surrounding reply etiquettes remain the same as they have always been, since time immemorial. Having RSVP etiquette is a perfect opportunity to show that you are considerate and respectful of other people's time and thoughts.


The term RSVP is a polite way of requesting a response to the invitation, not a suggestion to the invited guest to respond if he or she feels like it.


For those people out there who are still in the dark as to what I'm talking or rambling about, I would urge you to read this interesting article on RSVP.


Alright people. Think carefully again when you receive an invite in future (regardless of what the invitation is for). Just allocate a few seconds to RSVP which will go a long way in aleviating any problems your host may encounter. You may think it is trivial and silly, but one fine day, you yourself may be at the receiving end. Squirm if you must!!!