Saturday, July 24, 2010
Today I boycotted the world
24 July 2010, Saturday
Today I boycotted the world
I slept but I did not fall asleep
I ate but I it did not satisfy my hunger
I drank but it did not quench my thirst
I read but the words were blur
I wrote but it was unintelligible
I spoke but no one listened to me
I sang but there was no melody
I lie down but the mattress seemed hard
I cried but there were no tears
I ran and I stumbled
I fell into a deep hole
I bade goodbye
But the universe is still spinning
And reality hit me
I'm still here
The world still needs me
It continues to embrace me
Today I boycotted the world
I slept but I did not fall asleep
I ate but I it did not satisfy my hunger
I drank but it did not quench my thirst
I read but the words were blur
I wrote but it was unintelligible
I spoke but no one listened to me
I sang but there was no melody
I lie down but the mattress seemed hard
I cried but there were no tears
I ran and I stumbled
I fell into a deep hole
I bade goodbye
But the universe is still spinning
And reality hit me
I'm still here
The world still needs me
It continues to embrace me
Sleep eluded me yet again....
24 July 2010, Saturday
Sleep eluded me last night. Try as I might, my eyes refused to shut. So, I lay awake the entire night. I was tempted to get out of bed, but was too lazy. I was hoping against hope that my tired eyes would finally shut. Alas, I stayed awake till I heard the azan for subuh prayers.
Normally, when there are a lot of things on my mind, sleep would elude me. And yesterday, this condition was made worse by the fact that I had taken a nap in the afternoon. Usually, try as I might, I cannot fall asleep during the day unless I'm mighty tired. I would usually be tossing here and there until it was time for me to get my butt off the bed.
And yesterday, I made the gravest mistake of drinking hazelnut coffee to keep me awake during my English class. So, it came as no surprise when my eyes refused to shut and sleep eluded me. Any caffeinated drink would keep me awake the entire night, and I've failed, yet again to avoid cofffee or tea, especially those taken in the later part of the day.
Sleep eluded me last night. Try as I might, my eyes refused to shut. So, I lay awake the entire night. I was tempted to get out of bed, but was too lazy. I was hoping against hope that my tired eyes would finally shut. Alas, I stayed awake till I heard the azan for subuh prayers.
Normally, when there are a lot of things on my mind, sleep would elude me. And yesterday, this condition was made worse by the fact that I had taken a nap in the afternoon. Usually, try as I might, I cannot fall asleep during the day unless I'm mighty tired. I would usually be tossing here and there until it was time for me to get my butt off the bed.
And yesterday, I made the gravest mistake of drinking hazelnut coffee to keep me awake during my English class. So, it came as no surprise when my eyes refused to shut and sleep eluded me. Any caffeinated drink would keep me awake the entire night, and I've failed, yet again to avoid cofffee or tea, especially those taken in the later part of the day.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Sebelum kamu...
21 July 2010, Wednesday
Sebelum kamu melihat mawar yang berduri
Sebelum kamu melihat mawar yang berduri
lihatlah
terlebih dahulu keindahan bunganya
Sebelum
kamu mengeluh mengenai keterikan panas matahari
kecapilah
pancaran cahayanya
Sebelum
kamu merungut tentang kepekatan dan kegelapan malam
nikmatilah
kesunyian dan kebeningan malam hari
Sebelum kamu mengeluh mengenai curahan hujan
panjatkan kesyukuran ke atas nikmat yang Tuhan kurniakan
Sebelum kamu merungut tentang pasanganmu
Cerminkanlah diri mu terlebih dahulu
I fell into a deep hole
21 July 2010, Wednesday
I sit and ponder
of all the times
you have ripped me apart
I walked and reminisced
of all the hurt and pain
you have inflicted
I ran and scrambled
and remembered
the deep despair
I fell
I fell into a rut
I plummeted into a deep hole
I lay buried under a rubble
WanKinsella@Lubukhatiku
I sit and ponder
of all the times
you have ripped me apart
I walked and reminisced
of all the hurt and pain
you have inflicted
I ran and scrambled
and remembered
the deep despair
I fell
I fell into a rut
I plummeted into a deep hole
I lay buried under a rubble
WanKinsella@Lubukhatiku
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Time to spring clean my bedroom!!!
14 July 2010, Wednesday
The last couple of days I've been doing spring cleaning of my bedroom. My husband has been complaining incessantly that my stuff occupies 90% of the room! Is it really? Perhaps he was right. Then again, he could be exaggerating.
So, yesterday, as my class was canceled, I took the opportunity to clean up the mess. I've been mulling over which stuff I deemed "throwable' and those which no longer deserve a place in my bedroom.
Funny, when it's time for spring cleaning, there would be bound to be things that you would want to throw away without hesitation (even though you had decided to keep that during the last spring cleaning); and things that you think, ponder, muse, mull over, and contemplate numerous times before you come to a conclusion on what to be thrown away; and there would also be things where, try as you might, you just cannot bear to part with them. I guess that's human nature. It's interesting to discover the things you and your family members keep.
The last spring cleaning I did was after my house was renovated. That was the longest renovation I had to endure, starting from January right up to May 2010, a full five months. And at that time, I was really brutal in discarding all the things that no longer jive with my newly renovated house.
I had donated most of my pots and pans, crockeries, cutleries, and many other knicks and knacks to a children's home in Rawang. And a few other stuff were donated to my sister in Putrajaya. I had even given away many potted plants to the guys who came to redo my garden. Those yonder days when my garden was filled to the brim with plants and plants and plants are a thing of the past.
Today, I fully embrace a minimalist concept in my house decor. The garden today looked completely different with just a couple of potted plants lining the fence separating my neighbour's house. And under the pergola, I only have a fish pond, a garden table and four chairs, a lattice and "tiang seri" adorning the pergola area, with two potted water plants in the pond and just one plant next to the lattice. I used to have numerous potted plants under the pergola!!
And with that in mind, I'm all set to do the same with my bedroom....Alas, I realised, it was much easier to throw away things in the kitchen, things in the living room, in the dining room, in the garden, and in my backyard. It's also easier to throw away things in my store, what I had called "The small room under the staircase".
But things in my bedroom? I will continue to mull, ponder, muse, think, contemplate before I throw them away. Meanwhile, I've managed to clean 20% of the mess only. And for sure, my husband will continue to nag, pester, hassle and hound me until I dispose of most of the junks which are dear to my heart....
The last couple of days I've been doing spring cleaning of my bedroom. My husband has been complaining incessantly that my stuff occupies 90% of the room! Is it really? Perhaps he was right. Then again, he could be exaggerating.
So, yesterday, as my class was canceled, I took the opportunity to clean up the mess. I've been mulling over which stuff I deemed "throwable' and those which no longer deserve a place in my bedroom.
Funny, when it's time for spring cleaning, there would be bound to be things that you would want to throw away without hesitation (even though you had decided to keep that during the last spring cleaning); and things that you think, ponder, muse, mull over, and contemplate numerous times before you come to a conclusion on what to be thrown away; and there would also be things where, try as you might, you just cannot bear to part with them. I guess that's human nature. It's interesting to discover the things you and your family members keep.
The last spring cleaning I did was after my house was renovated. That was the longest renovation I had to endure, starting from January right up to May 2010, a full five months. And at that time, I was really brutal in discarding all the things that no longer jive with my newly renovated house.
I had donated most of my pots and pans, crockeries, cutleries, and many other knicks and knacks to a children's home in Rawang. And a few other stuff were donated to my sister in Putrajaya. I had even given away many potted plants to the guys who came to redo my garden. Those yonder days when my garden was filled to the brim with plants and plants and plants are a thing of the past.
Today, I fully embrace a minimalist concept in my house decor. The garden today looked completely different with just a couple of potted plants lining the fence separating my neighbour's house. And under the pergola, I only have a fish pond, a garden table and four chairs, a lattice and "tiang seri" adorning the pergola area, with two potted water plants in the pond and just one plant next to the lattice. I used to have numerous potted plants under the pergola!!
And with that in mind, I'm all set to do the same with my bedroom....Alas, I realised, it was much easier to throw away things in the kitchen, things in the living room, in the dining room, in the garden, and in my backyard. It's also easier to throw away things in my store, what I had called "The small room under the staircase".
But things in my bedroom? I will continue to mull, ponder, muse, think, contemplate before I throw them away. Meanwhile, I've managed to clean 20% of the mess only. And for sure, my husband will continue to nag, pester, hassle and hound me until I dispose of most of the junks which are dear to my heart....
Procrastination is the FATHER of all evil
14 July 2010, Wednesday
It's funny that people do not treat time with the respect it deserves. Many people have the tendency to procrastinate.
Procrastination, the habit of putting tasks off to the last possible minute, can be a major problem in both our career and our personal life. Side effects include missed opportunities, frenzied work hours, stress, overwhelm, resentment, and guilt.
Some people enjoy procrastinating. People procrastinate because they're overwhelmed with too much on their plate, and procrastination gives them an escape. Other times they''ll feel tired and lazy, and they just can't get going. But for most others, it's more of a habit.
We put things off because we don't want to do them, or because we have too many other things to do. Putting things off—big or small—is part of being human.
Some people love the rush of adrenalin they get when they finish a task ten minutes before it's due, but we (and our body) are getting tired of pulling all-nighters. We feel okay about procrastinating while in college, but you worry that this habit will follow you into your working life.
If we put off washing the dishes, but the dishes don't bother us, who cares? When our procrastination leaves us feeling discouraged and overburdened, however, it is time to take action.
For most procrastinators, because it is habitual, they aren't going to wake up tomorrow and never procrastinate again. But they might wake up tomorrow and do one or two simple things that will help them finish that task a little earlier or with less stress.
Taking the time to learn about why we procrastinate may help us avoid the cycle whereby we swear up and down that we will never procrastinate again, only to find that the next time we have a task due, we are up until 5 a.m. trying to complete the task - without knowing why or how we got there.
Personally, I avoid procrastination like the plague!!! I abhor people who are habitual procrastinators. And many people close and dear to me find my habit intimidating because I'm a stickler for punctuality and DO NOT LIKE to do things at the last minute. And I become easily upset and jittery when people close to me do things at the last minute.
I simply do not understand why people need to procrastinate when things can be done early, in a systematic way and with sufficient time to complete a task or job. Especially to my loved ones, STOP PROCRASTINATING.......and get your task/assignment/work done ASAP!!!
It's funny that people do not treat time with the respect it deserves. Many people have the tendency to procrastinate.
Procrastination, the habit of putting tasks off to the last possible minute, can be a major problem in both our career and our personal life. Side effects include missed opportunities, frenzied work hours, stress, overwhelm, resentment, and guilt.
Some people enjoy procrastinating. People procrastinate because they're overwhelmed with too much on their plate, and procrastination gives them an escape. Other times they''ll feel tired and lazy, and they just can't get going. But for most others, it's more of a habit.
We put things off because we don't want to do them, or because we have too many other things to do. Putting things off—big or small—is part of being human.
Some people love the rush of adrenalin they get when they finish a task ten minutes before it's due, but we (and our body) are getting tired of pulling all-nighters. We feel okay about procrastinating while in college, but you worry that this habit will follow you into your working life.
If we put off washing the dishes, but the dishes don't bother us, who cares? When our procrastination leaves us feeling discouraged and overburdened, however, it is time to take action.
For most procrastinators, because it is habitual, they aren't going to wake up tomorrow and never procrastinate again. But they might wake up tomorrow and do one or two simple things that will help them finish that task a little earlier or with less stress.
Taking the time to learn about why we procrastinate may help us avoid the cycle whereby we swear up and down that we will never procrastinate again, only to find that the next time we have a task due, we are up until 5 a.m. trying to complete the task - without knowing why or how we got there.
Personally, I avoid procrastination like the plague!!! I abhor people who are habitual procrastinators. And many people close and dear to me find my habit intimidating because I'm a stickler for punctuality and DO NOT LIKE to do things at the last minute. And I become easily upset and jittery when people close to me do things at the last minute.
I simply do not understand why people need to procrastinate when things can be done early, in a systematic way and with sufficient time to complete a task or job. Especially to my loved ones, STOP PROCRASTINATING.......and get your task/assignment/work done ASAP!!!
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Footprints to Temasek, the Lion City
6 July 2010, Tuesday
My research into my roots and my dream of writing a book to trace my family's history will take me to Temasek, the Lion City over the next couple of days. Tomorrow, my exciting journey to unravel my past will unfold. Tomorrow, I'll begin my Footprints to the Lion City....
My research into my roots and my dream of writing a book to trace my family's history will take me to Temasek, the Lion City over the next couple of days. Tomorrow, my exciting journey to unravel my past will unfold. Tomorrow, I'll begin my Footprints to the Lion City....
Monday, July 5, 2010
The pain that is in my heart
5 July 2010, Monday
I am looking at the sky, the tress, the lights and the people.
All leaving their smells on this world.
I wish to forget all the times of pain and loneliness.
I wish the time would stop
and I could go back to the centre of my despair.
To see again the people who have broken my heart,
to see my fears, inside their sad faces.
They looked into my black eyes and not the pain that is in my heart
I cry
I sing
And I wait for someone to embrace me.
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