The Pious Wife

22 April 2010, Thursday 

Marriage to her is one half of the deen,

The benefit Allah has put in her is yet to be seen.
She wears her hijab for her Lord, to please and obey,
She turns to Allah for solat at least five times each day.

She prays in the night and makes sure to awake you,
And sprinkles you with water if sleep should overtake you.

She protects her chastity with firmness because she does not desire,
To displease Allah and end up in the tormenting fire.

She asks the people who know when matters need to be rectified,
She is not blinded by self righteousness and foolish pride.

She is humble and kind to her husband as Allah has commanded,
Never leaving him alone, isolated, nor stranded.

She opens her mouth only to say what is best,
Not questioning her husband when he makes a request.

She takes care of herself and never ceases to try,
To beautify herself so to please his eye.

She is a pleasure Allah has given to us in this life,
Be thankful to Allah alone for His blessing,
THE PIOUS WIFE

Don't all Muslim men wish they too can have a Pious Wife?

May Allah make all Muslim women, in particular my daughter, my sisters and me from amongst the above, Amin, Ya Rabbal'alamin

The Pious Husband

22 April 2010, Thursday

Marriage to him is one half of the deen,

To please Allah (swt) is more than a dream.

He wears his beard for his Lord, to please and obey,

He turns to Allah (swt) for solat at least five times a day.

He prays in the night and makes sure to wake you,

And strives during daylight to provide and protect you.

He lowers his gaze with firmness because he does not desire,

To displease Allah (swt) and face His just ire,

He asks advice from the ummah, and his wife too,

Before making decisions that he might later rue.

To his wife he is humble and always most kind,

Sharing his burdens with strength and clear mind.

He opens his mouth only to say what is best,

Weighing all options ‘fore denying a request.

He takes care of himself and family too

Knowing that Allah (swt) will see them through.

He is a pleasure from Allah (swt) above

Be thankful to Allah (swt) and His blessings through love.

Don't all Muslimah wish they too can have a Pious Husband? May Allah make all Muslim men, in particular my husband, sons and brothers from amongst the above, Amin, Ya Rabbal'alamin.

Love's melody overflowing from my heart's piano

19 April 2010, Monday

sayang, today you add another year to your life

today, i love you more than life itself

loving you i truly adore

i could not ask, ask for more.

i never can find the right words to say,

i just go with the flow each and everyday.

i never knew there could be love like this,

in a world full of chaos, its always you i miss.

if there was one thing I could ask Allah for,

i would tell him that its you i adore.

my heart skips a beat when i hear the door,

because i know its you coming back for more.

since we had the four kittos together,

i know we can withstand any kind of weather.

i will pray to Allah

i will make doa for us,

so that Allah s.w.t will bless the kids' and our lives.

you have the key to my heart,

you unlocked it so now we can never part.

my heart painted an ancient song

but for us there won’t be an eternity

but no matter what we will try and try

and I’m sure we will always remain happy…

so if you listen very close

there is a special symphony

from someone’s heart piano

is where you’ll find love’s melody.

you are someone I love

i’ll keep on looking at you.

there are things I can’t say

for now love’s melody will do

the feelings I can’t convey

i stand by them, singing in soprano.

so listen to my love’s melody

overflowing from my heart’s piano........

happy birthday sayang
i will always love you....

Kalau dahi tak mencecah sejadah di dunia....

15 April 2010, Thursday

I sometime listen to Radio Ikim which provides interesting, useful and beneficial contents to inspire listeners, especially those who are feeling melancholic, low-spirited and disconsolate. And, as it so happened, when I tuned in to this  frequency, I was mesmerised by the rendition of a poem which touched my very soul.

I could feel each verse delving into the very core of my being. I could feel a deep sense of regret,  a feeling of repentance, a feeling of compunction and a pang of conscience, and my thoughts immediately centred and focused on The Creator, The Exalted, Allah, s.w.t.

At that very moment, I felt really small, a minute being, a lost soul in a  huge and deep ocean. I felt I was drowning. I felt pulled under, I felt breathless. I felt the end was near, but  the Almighty, Allah, s.w.t. saved me. Allah s.w.t., the Gracious salvaged and resuscitated me. I was revived.

This beautiful poem addresses solat. A delightful sonnet that posed many questions to the very deep edge of my soul. Is solat important in my life? Is solat important in my husband's life? Is solat important in my children's lives? Do we place solat high on a pedestal? Or  do we discard it as a time-waster, as something not worth practising. Do we just dismiss it as something useless?

It's time to ponder.......

Dahi Cecah Ke Sejadah

Bersihkanlah dirimu sebelum kamu dimandikan
Berwudhu’lah kamu sebelum kamu diwudhu’kan
Dan solatlah kamu sebelum kamu disolatkan

Tutuplah ‘auratmu sebelum ‘auratmu ditutupkan
Dengan kain kafan yang serba putih
Pada waktu itu tidak guna lagi bersedih
Walaupun orang yang hadir itu merintih

Selepas itu kamu akan diletak di atas lantai
Lalu dilaksanakanlah solat Jenazah
Dengan empat kali takbir dan satu salam
Berserta Fatihah, Selawat dan doa
Sebagai memenuhi tuntutan Fardhu Kifayah

 Tapi apakah empat kali takbir itu dapat menebus
Segala dosa meninggalkan solat sepanjang hidup?

Apakah solat Jenazah yang tanpa rukuk dan sujud
Dapat membayar hutang rukuk dan sujudmu yang telah luput?
Sungguh tertipulah dirimu jika beranggapan demikian

 Justeru kumenyeru sekelian Muslimin dan Muslimat
Usunglah dirimu ke tikar solat
Sebelum kamu diusung ke liang lahad
Menjadi makanan cacing dan makanan ulat

 Iringi dirimu ke masjid
Sebelum kamu diiringi ke Pusara

Tangisilah dosa-dosamu di dunia
Kerana tangisan tidak berguna di alam baqa’

Sucikanlah dirimu sebelum kamu disucikan
Sedarlah kamu sebelum kamu disedarkan
Dengan panggilan ‘Izrail yang menakutkan

Berimanlah kamu sebelum kamu ditalkinkan
Kerana ianya berguna untuk yang tinggal
Bukan yang pergi

Beristighfarlah kamu sebelum kamu diistighfarkan
Namun ketika itu istighfar tidak menyelamatkan

 Ingatlah di mana saja kamu berada
Kamu tetap memijak bumi Tuhan
Dan dibumbungi dengan langit Tuhan
Serta menikmati rezeki Tuhan

Justeru bila Dia menyeru, sambutlah seruan-Nya
Sebelum Dia memanggilmu buat kali yang terakhirnya

 Ingatlah kamu dahulu hanya setitis air yang tidak bererti
Lalu menjadi segumpal darah
Lalu menjadi seketul daging
Lalu daging itu membaluti tulang
Lalu jadilah kamu insan yang mempunyai erti

 Ingatlah asal usulmu yang tidak bernilai itu
Yang kalau jatuh ke tanah
Ayam tak patok itik tak sudu
Tapi Allah mengangkatmu ke suatu mercu
Yang lebih agung dari malaikat

 Lahirmu bukan untuk dunia
Tapi gunakanlah ia buat melayar bahtera akhirat

Sambutlah seruan ‘Hayya ‘alas Solaah’
Dengan penuh rela dan bersedia
Sambutlah seruan ‘Hayya ‘alal Falaah’
Jalan kemenangan akhirat dan dunia

Ingatlah yang kekal ialah amal
Menjadi bekal sepanjang jalan
Menjadi teman di perjalanan

 Guna kembali ke pangkuan Tuhan
Pada hari itu tiada berguna harta, tahta dan putera
Isteri, kad kredit dan kereta
Kondominium, saham dan niaga
Kalau dahi tak mencecah sejadah di dunia.

Kalau dahi tak mencecah sejadah di dunia.

Kalau dahi tak mencecah sejadah di dunia.

I Can Be The Happiest Woman In The World

9 April 2010, Friday

Today, I begin my quest to be the happiest woman in the world. Today, I start my sojourn into how I can achieve utmost happiness as a woman. Today, my journey begins. Insyallah, Allah s.w.t will grant my wish.  

When death comes knocking

3 April 2010, Saturday 

LIFE EXPECTANCY TIMEPIECE
I came across this advertisement about a life expectancy timepiece. Apparently this is one timepiece everyone should have in order to remind themselves of the frailty of life so that they will be nicer to everyone they meet from now on.  (If I have cash to throw around, I know of a number of people I'd like to give this to as presents.......).

ESTIMATED LIFESPAN?
And what's interesting about this Life Expectancy Timepiece is that it utilizes actuarial tables that insurance companies use, taking that calculated data to arrive at your estimated life span.

COUNTDOWN?
This number will then start counting down the number of years, months, weeks, days, hours, minutes and seconds before the scythed one comes to take you away on a one-way trip.

TIME TO REPENT?
Sounds simple and I'm sure everyone wishes they can own this timepiece, so that you will know how much longer you have before you are called to be before Allah. And perhaps you think you'll have time to repent, and atone yourself before your time is up.

ONLY ALLAH, THE EXALTED KNOWS
But for the Believers, only Allah knows when exactly your life will be snuffed out. When death comes a-knocking, it matters not who you are or what you've got; how old you are or where you belong, whether you have friends aplenty or live all alone...

ARE YOU AFRAID TO DIE?
Death will one day definitely come a-knocking at your door. Do you dread that day? Are you afraid to die? Do you really think you will? Why is it that we're so terrified of Death, when we all know it's inevitable?

DEATH IS INEVITABLE
There are some who don't even believe about life after death. They don't believe in the existence of Allah, neither do they believe in the existence of Heaven and Hell. Still others believe that they will live forever. But regardless of your beliefs or where you think you're going from here, one thing seems to be undisputed: we will all experience Death at some point.

MY LOVED ONES IN HEREAFTER
My own curiosity is more about why we're so afraid of it. Maybe it's because I've lived through so many. So many I've loved have left this place called Earth and are now in hereafter.

Each time I've had these experiences, they've all been vastly different. Not just because of the nature of my relationships with those who've passed, but also because of the nature of who I was and/or AM when it happens.

MEMORIES AND PRESENCE WILL LINGER FOREVER
One thing that seems most obvious to me now is this: We do not LOSE them. Though they've left us physically, their memories and presence will linger and live forever.

Over the last 5 decades, I've seen death knocking on many doors, and many of them, doors of people who are really very very dear to me.

THE DAY I LOST MY ONLY LITTLE BROTHER
I recalled vividly the day I lost my little brother. The year was 1965, and at that time I was 6 years old, too small to realise and know what was happening in the world at that time.

The funny thing was, I wasn't even aware that my mum was pregnant. All I knew at that time was having one elder sister, Wan Arfah, and four older brothers, Wan Fusil, Wan Ishak, Wan Elias and Wan Saleh and one younger sister, Wan Sofiah.

MAK WENT INTO LABOUR
Everything happened so quickly. I recalled faintly the commotion when Mak went into labour (at that time, I thought she was sick), and later was told that Ayah had taken her to the hospital.

Everything was a blur. The only thing I could distinctly remember was Ayah coming back from the hospital without Mak.

TEARS STREAMED DOWN MY DAD'S FACE
I recalled vividly Ayah standing at the door to our house at Jalan Lada, carrying a bundle, and I saw the tears streaming from his eyes, the tears of a father who had to bury his child, yet again.

To me, at that time, the bundle looked like a big fish tightly wrapped. I couldn't even remember the funeral. I didn't even cry. How could I as I didn't even know what had happened.

THE THIRD SON AYAH HAD TO BURY
This was the third son Ayah had to bury. I'm sure every single one had been devastating for him. No dad has to bury their own kid, but Ayah had to bury three of his boys. The first two were my eldest brother, Wan Mohammed Yusoff who died within four days after he was born, and my second brother, Wan Mohamed Faisol, who died at the age of four and a half.

MY LITTLE BROTHER, WAN MOHAMMED ZAKERY
Later Ayah told us that he had named my little brother Wan Mohammed Zakery. As we were in Singapore at that time, he was buried at Bidadari graveyard. I heard that the Singapore government had excavated the graveyard in 2008 to make way for some developments and all the graves were moved to another location.

I LOVE YOU, LIL BRO
Dear Zakery, my little brother, though I do not know you, though I've never touched you, though I've never seen your face, you have always been in my heart, and will always remain there. There's not a day or a moment that I do not think of you lil bro.

MY LOVED ONES WHO HAVE DEPARTED
Neither do I not think of all my loved ones who have left me the last 5 decades. People I dearly loved like Pan (my paternal grandma who passed away in 1981), Mami PahBee (my maternal aunty), Pak Mat (my maternal uncle), Mamak Udin (my maternal uncle), Mama Chak (my paternal aunty), and all the other uncles, aunties, cousins, and some of my dear friends like Rosli, Norlida, Arifah, Fauzi, Ruben, Maniam, Bahiyah, and more recenlty, Eda (someone I was very close to when I was in Singapore) who died of breast cancer.

I've also lost both my maternal grandparents and paternal grandfather long before I was brought into this world.

MAK, AYAH, MAK - YOU SHALL RESIDE IN A SPECIAL PLACE IN MY HEART
And my most devastating loss was losing Mak (2000), Ayah (2008) and Mak, my ma-in-law (2009). Even though all of you have left me, you will forever remain in my heart, and I will always pray for you.


When Death comes knocking
it matters not
what role you played
in the drama of Life,
how many convertibles or expensive cars you owned
or how many trophies or medals you won
whether you have realized your dream
or simply lived in vain

When Death comes knocking
It's simply time for you to go.....

all dark clouds will soon fade away...

31 March 2010, Wednesday

never thought it would be so harsh living in this world
surrounded by people who matter to you but sometimes hurt you

many times i just want to give up
alas, there is always a small voice within me
willing me to go on and cheering me up

sometimes in life i go through challenging and daunting times
but in due course testing times will bring me happiness
happiness that will uplift me
happiness that will fill my heart, my mind, and my soul
happiness that will give me the strength i need

things are likely to happen for a reason
which is difficult to see unless i seek it out
sometimes it takes ages just to see it
but more often than not, all it takes is just a little patience

i always cajole myself to remain patient
for deep in my heart i know this disheartening times will soon pass

take one day at a time
do not worry about tomorrow
it may be joy
it may be sorrow

every raindrop has a rainbow in the offing
and every cloud has a silver lining
waiting just for me in the horizon

all dark clouds will soon fade away
and everything will be jolly and sunny soon

WanKinsella@Lubukhatiku

When anguish comes thumping

30 March 2010, Tuesday

When anguish comes thumping
There’s no one home
Gone out gallavanting
And I'm here all alone
 

Anguish comes thumping
Week after week
I try not to heed
But it caused my heart to bleed

But anguish comes thumping
Day after day day
Oh please just go away
And leave me in peace

Anguish comes thumping
What does he really fancy?
Is he here to lodge?
Or simply enjoy goading me?

Sorrow here sorrow there sorrow everywhere

29 March 2010, Monday

sorrow
sorrow here sorrow there
sorrow in my heart

sorrow in my soul
sorrow in my mind
sorrow in my skin

sorrow in my bones 

sorrow coming from you
till my heart bleeds red
sorrow you caused till the skin and bones rip
sorrow you caused till I break into tears 

sorrow from then till now
sorrow in my head

sorrow in my heart
sorrow in my mind

sorrow in my soul 

sorrow happening in my sleep
sorrow happening in my thoughts
sorrow happening when I'm alone
sorrow happening in my room

sorrow happening in my bed where I'm all alone
sorrow happening every hour every minute every second of my life 

sorrow caused by anger, fury and rage
sorrow caused by deep hurt
sorrow caused by desolation and gloom
sorrow caused by grief and despair
sorrow caused by anguish and bewilderment 

sorrow caused by you

sorrow caused by you and others
sorrow caused by those who professed to love me

sorrow is driving me insane
causing my head to spin till it fills up my veins

i go to sleep never to wake up and see the light 

the light that will end my pain for good!

My legs went on autopilot mode

26 March 2010, Friday

Speaking of autopilot mode which I just wrote and posted yesterday, a funny and hilarious thing happened to me yesterday.

I was scheduled to meet my husband at Sungai Besi LRT station so that he could meet me half-way, enroute to his office at UPM as I had wanted to see the beautiful wood panelling that was installed on his office walls.

He wanted to attend the KL Book Fair at PWTC, and naturally I wanted to tag along.

These days, I love walking, so as usual, I took my own sweet time walking to the LRT sttaion at Bandar Tun Razak from my house which normallly takes less than 10 minutes.

And as I walked, I was dreaming of all the books that I was going to lay my hands on, plus having to scout around for books which my daughter had asked us to buy. We both are voracious readers and without fail would indulge in books during such fairs.

Once I reached the station, I paid for the ticket to Sungai Besi station.

And soon after, I walked through the turnstile and my feet took me to my usual and familiar route, i.e the track that's leading to Sentul Timur. After alighting the staircase, then only I realised with amusement that I was on the wrong side of the track.

I was supposed to take the track heading towards Sri Petaling. And as I walked up the stairs again and moved towards the stairs to the other side, I was laughing and chiding myself for being so caught in an autopilot mode. It was really hilarious because I had just touched that topic a day earlier.

My autopilot mode had conditioned my brain to head towards the Sentul Timur route as that has been my usual route 99% of the time. About the very few occasions that I had taken the Sri Petaling route was during the Commonwealth Games which Malaysia hosted way back in 1998. Back then, I was a Commonwealth Games volunteer.

What was hilarious about the whole thing was that, despite my brain knowing where to go when I had correctly asked for the ticket to Sungai Besi, yet my legs had gone on autopilot mode...